Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Book review: Love No Matter What

I've learned a thing or two in 7 years of marriage. And the most important thing I learned is that I am a HORRIBLE passenger in the car and am constantly gasping and clutching the door handle and doing other annoying things. Even though my husband is a perfectly fabulous driver. I'm just a bit of a control freak.  On a related note, I've also learned that the best way to get through car trips without me driving Daniel insane is for me to be doing something other than looking out the window.  Fortunately, just before we left on last weekend's car trip, I received a copy of a new book called Love No Matter What. Here's a bit about this book, from the publisher's website:

How will you respond when your child makes a decision you don't agree with?
Parents and kids will never agree on everything but what can mom and dad do when that decision—whether a matter of preference, spirituality, or morality—is something they think is totally wrong? Author and speaker Brenda Garrison knows all too well that how parents respond will either build a wall or a bridge between them and their child.
Brenda and her husband were forced to answer this question when their oldest daughter Katie abruptly moved out of the house with no means of support. It was not an illegal or immoral decision, but it was one that wasn't good for her. Their determination to keep an open door of communication is documented not only by their story, but by comments from Katie in each chapter as she offers insights from her own perspective.
Also included are other family scenarios—everything from matters of preference to foolish, immoral, and even illegal decisions—as well as insights into different styles of parenting such as servant, checked-out, gotcha, scared, and controlling parents.
With practical tips and relatable stories, Brenda shares how to model God's parenting style and explains the difference between the parent's responsibilities and the child's, then helps mom and dad discover ways to develop and nurture a relationship with their child that will last a lifetime.

This is a terrifying, but really valuable book.  I'm grateful to have read it before my kids reach the age where they have the ability to do things that I really disagree with (remember, control freak!)  This isn't a book about fixing your kids, but about examining your own attitude, being aware of your own sins and problems and of being aware that your child is not going to grow up to be exactly the person you think they should be (and that's okay).   It's also a book about being strong in your own convictions and being able to stand up for those, but in a loving and manner that doesn't turn your child away from a relationship with you and possibly even a relationship with God. The author has a nice, conversational writing style, and she shares openly from her own life and experiences, both the struggles and the successes.  All in all, an excellent parenting book with a message all parents need to hear.

Disclosure: I received this book from Booksneeze to review for myself. All opinions posted here are mine and mine alone.